" I'm bach!!"
Albert thinks it is necessary to point out that " Im bach" is NOT a spelling mistake. In fact, he was trying to imitate the immortal phrase of a time travelling cybernetic organism who now is the Governor of California. "Terminator" .
Now for the serious stuff. He feels compelled to apologise to his legions of loyal followers of not updating his blog. He really wasnt trying to starve your intellects to death. He was simply caught up penning his greatest piece of literature(script) for the inter-school drama. What? Yeah, he still is in SS17. That brings us to the second issue at hand.
Apparantly, Albert managed to persuade his mom to let him stay at SS17. Of course there is more to it than that. Albert has his own conspiracy theories as to why he managed the seemingly impossible feat. But there is no need to share that here. I'm sure you arent all that interested anyway.......(evil laugh).
So. It has been an eventful couple of weeks. And he has to say, school has become more beautiful ever since it was soo cruelly wrenched from his hands. But he's back. Oops, he means "bach". And everything is falling so beautifully in place now. He was asked to MC the school's 1st official Prefect Installation day! How cool is that? He'll be part of history. Also, because of a Sweet Darling, he is in the debate team now. Whoa, yeah he knows. DEBATE TEAM!! The Sweet Darling would prefer that he doesnt mention her, so he wont. Also, Sweet Darling, you have climbed from number 5 to number 1 now, just thought you'd like to know. Huh? Its none of you business everyone else, lets move on.
He also joined the Editorial Board. And he thought he would get the reporter job. But he went one better. He ended up being the Head of English. Whoa!! That means any piece of English literature has to go through him 1st. *high 5*
And then he was tasked with the task of writing the script for this year's inter-drama. And since last year's was a disaster, you would expect that all he had to do was go one better. But no. He's pretty sure he's blown it outta park baby! He actually thinks the school can win it this time!! Again, being part of history. But unfortunately, he cant put it up here, because of copyright issues.
And he is also in the same tuition centre as his classmates, which is really near Taylors( for the better informed, you would know the significance of this). And so it is like school is a little bit more extended. Yay!( he really isnt very normal).
So this is bliss then. It just doesnt get any better than this. Life is absolutely perfect. He guesses the only downside is that it will all eventually come to an end by this year. Yes, he cant imagine life after school. It makes him very sad. But then again its the irony of those extremely happy moments in our lives, that it has to come to an end eventually. Sigh.
But until then, we shall all revel in the existance of Albert that breathes life to this blog, and maybe, just maybe, gives you people out there a little bit of inspiration.
Soo baby, " Im bach!"
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Saturday, January 06, 2007
Trials and Tribulations
Sean said it best when he said, affectionately, and most of all, most sincerely, : "Why do you have to go now, after we grew attached to you?" For the unacknowledged, lets take things back to the 1st day of school.
It was a Wednesday, and he came too early. It was quite dark. Insects and such were still not finished with their singing. And Albert wasn't done with SMK SS17. It was lingering in his head, telling them the truth, but he didn't want to blurt it out to everyone yet. You know, it was magic, the 1st day of school. In class, suddenly as everyone from 2 months ago(which was an eternity in terms of holidays) flowed into the class, it all seemed soo perfect. It was how it was meant to be. Everyone immediatly stirred up fond memories in Albert's mind, the way he seemed to know them forever, the way they seemed still the same(no matter how much they changed), the way they always acted predictably, always congrous to their personality that Albert knows, and has learnt to love, soo well.
Thursday, was somewhat stressful, the knowledge of his time with them being limited, having lost all control of the Reins of Time. He eventually told a few people. Tess, well she was, quite obviously shaken up about it. Her voice was quivering, and the colour from her face seemed to just drain out(or she just doesnt have any colour), when she would quiz him on it. She didnt seem to be able to accept it.
" Are you sure?"
"Have your parents paid the fees?"
"Your're going this Monday?"
She, as usual, didn't do anything "mushy". Didn't sink it yet Albert guesses. Didn't really sink in with Albert either.
Shereena on the other hand, was almost beside herself with delight when he broke the news to Redreena. Reddy was more sympathetic. Nevertheless, Shereena's feigned sense of amiability still is very much appreciated by Albert. Well, at least it was something.
Boon Han, well his exact words were, "Go lah you, bastard". Translation: "I so desperately dont want you to go, you're a good friend."
Friday creeped up regretably, as it was his last day of school. Today was a tell-all. Lay Yen(prefectorial superior) was angry with him. Yih Ren sympathised. Devan was suprisingly genial, Albert guesses he connected with him. Loges was as usual, full of expletives. When he told Amritha and Dian, Dian seemed somewhat indifferent, but Amritha being her responsible, practicle self, wanted to know if there was a difference with the syllabus, and then asked Albert to see Pn Sarojini about the transfer. She also didnt take it too well being told soo late. When Timothy found out it was his last day, he actually gave him a hug. ??!! Yes, Albert was quite taken aback, this is the same guy that wouldnt let you touch his shirt. Awefully sweet of him. Before school was over, Reddy warned Albert not to forget her. He countered back saying not even when they would be married, he would forget.
"I'll invite you to my wedding," offered Reddy. " "Well if I did get married, which is unlikely, I would definately invite you." assured Albert. She then gave him a nice smile, and told him, somewhat intuitively, "I have this feeling that you will not be going there," and in a very typical fashion , she continued, "So who will be the bride?"
Just as he was walking out of the class, the ever jovial but ignorant Mee Pei, in a most serious tone of voice, said "This Monday, Chinese class, after school, 5sk1." Albert, in an equally serious tone replied " I dont think I can make it." Thats when it really hit home. This is it. Sixth sense or intuition or not, he IS going there, SMK Stella Marris.
After that, he and a couple of friends went to Mc D for lunch, a sombre affair really. Then they went for game of futsal. At least temporarily he could forget all his worries, and concentrate on his testimonial match. Appart from almost having his jaw dislocated by Sam's poweful but inaccurate kick, and also having both legs suffer serious cramps, it was quite fun. They then decided on doing this kinda thing fortnightly, but Albert sensed that this was largely more for his sake than to satisfy their "passion" for football.
Overall, it was a good way to bow out. 3 perfect days, capped by a good football match. But then again, why should he limit himself to just this three days, when theres a whole year of absolute bliss where he belongs? Everything, everyone was beautiful. From Pn Saro to his girl friends, and guy friends, and everyone in between. It was too much, way too much to walk away from prematurely. But it isn't his choice, going to this new school. Nevertheless, he is still very much subject to the whims and fancies of his parents. So what is he to do? He will try to talk himself out of it. He will pull out all the stops. Even is it escalates to a domestic World War lll, it will be worth it, just a shot at getting back to where he rightly belongs.
So, will he make it? Will he win back the most important thing in his life? You just have to keep your eyes peeled on Monday for a tall, dark, handsome Indian guy with a blue blazer roaming the grounds, with a wide stupid smile on his face.
Sean said it best when he said, affectionately, and most of all, most sincerely, : "Why do you have to go now, after we grew attached to you?" For the unacknowledged, lets take things back to the 1st day of school.
It was a Wednesday, and he came too early. It was quite dark. Insects and such were still not finished with their singing. And Albert wasn't done with SMK SS17. It was lingering in his head, telling them the truth, but he didn't want to blurt it out to everyone yet. You know, it was magic, the 1st day of school. In class, suddenly as everyone from 2 months ago(which was an eternity in terms of holidays) flowed into the class, it all seemed soo perfect. It was how it was meant to be. Everyone immediatly stirred up fond memories in Albert's mind, the way he seemed to know them forever, the way they seemed still the same(no matter how much they changed), the way they always acted predictably, always congrous to their personality that Albert knows, and has learnt to love, soo well.
Thursday, was somewhat stressful, the knowledge of his time with them being limited, having lost all control of the Reins of Time. He eventually told a few people. Tess, well she was, quite obviously shaken up about it. Her voice was quivering, and the colour from her face seemed to just drain out(or she just doesnt have any colour), when she would quiz him on it. She didnt seem to be able to accept it.
" Are you sure?"
"Have your parents paid the fees?"
"Your're going this Monday?"
She, as usual, didn't do anything "mushy". Didn't sink it yet Albert guesses. Didn't really sink in with Albert either.
Shereena on the other hand, was almost beside herself with delight when he broke the news to Redreena. Reddy was more sympathetic. Nevertheless, Shereena's feigned sense of amiability still is very much appreciated by Albert. Well, at least it was something.
Boon Han, well his exact words were, "Go lah you, bastard". Translation: "I so desperately dont want you to go, you're a good friend."
Friday creeped up regretably, as it was his last day of school. Today was a tell-all. Lay Yen(prefectorial superior) was angry with him. Yih Ren sympathised. Devan was suprisingly genial, Albert guesses he connected with him. Loges was as usual, full of expletives. When he told Amritha and Dian, Dian seemed somewhat indifferent, but Amritha being her responsible, practicle self, wanted to know if there was a difference with the syllabus, and then asked Albert to see Pn Sarojini about the transfer. She also didnt take it too well being told soo late. When Timothy found out it was his last day, he actually gave him a hug. ??!! Yes, Albert was quite taken aback, this is the same guy that wouldnt let you touch his shirt. Awefully sweet of him. Before school was over, Reddy warned Albert not to forget her. He countered back saying not even when they would be married, he would forget.
"I'll invite you to my wedding," offered Reddy. " "Well if I did get married, which is unlikely, I would definately invite you." assured Albert. She then gave him a nice smile, and told him, somewhat intuitively, "I have this feeling that you will not be going there," and in a very typical fashion , she continued, "So who will be the bride?"
Just as he was walking out of the class, the ever jovial but ignorant Mee Pei, in a most serious tone of voice, said "This Monday, Chinese class, after school, 5sk1." Albert, in an equally serious tone replied " I dont think I can make it." Thats when it really hit home. This is it. Sixth sense or intuition or not, he IS going there, SMK Stella Marris.
After that, he and a couple of friends went to Mc D for lunch, a sombre affair really. Then they went for game of futsal. At least temporarily he could forget all his worries, and concentrate on his testimonial match. Appart from almost having his jaw dislocated by Sam's poweful but inaccurate kick, and also having both legs suffer serious cramps, it was quite fun. They then decided on doing this kinda thing fortnightly, but Albert sensed that this was largely more for his sake than to satisfy their "passion" for football.
Overall, it was a good way to bow out. 3 perfect days, capped by a good football match. But then again, why should he limit himself to just this three days, when theres a whole year of absolute bliss where he belongs? Everything, everyone was beautiful. From Pn Saro to his girl friends, and guy friends, and everyone in between. It was too much, way too much to walk away from prematurely. But it isn't his choice, going to this new school. Nevertheless, he is still very much subject to the whims and fancies of his parents. So what is he to do? He will try to talk himself out of it. He will pull out all the stops. Even is it escalates to a domestic World War lll, it will be worth it, just a shot at getting back to where he rightly belongs.
So, will he make it? Will he win back the most important thing in his life? You just have to keep your eyes peeled on Monday for a tall, dark, handsome Indian guy with a blue blazer roaming the grounds, with a wide stupid smile on his face.
Friday, January 05, 2007
2006-2007
You know, the last few days of a year, after Christmas festivities and before the New Year havoc, is simply perfect for just staying idle, doing absolutely nothing. In this sort of mood, he would just reflect on the past year, being in a state of sentimental reminiscencing. So on that note let us give our mouse scrollers a good workout, and skew our delicate eyeballs with over excessive exposures to a plethora of screen glares. Enjoy.
The 2006 started of for Albert on a relatively good note, barring his parents' repeated attempts to enroll him into Catholic High, which is a VERY bad thing, just ask Hema. Fresh from a 7A PMR result, somewhat restored a bit more credibility to himslef. But that in no way prepared him for Add Math. All the horror stories which seemed then slightly exaggerated now did not even put paid to the terror of Add Math.
And then there was his 1st trip to MacDonalds. He was 16. Dont ask. Him and his classmates were audaciously attempting to paint his beloved class 4 sn 1. They managed the painting part. But the cleaning part, was more of a lets-see-how-much-we-can-flood-the-school-before-we-get-in-trouble sorta thing. By "we", he means "them". Although he didnt want to get involved, he inevitably got wet in a girls-gone-wild/wet fest; much to his delight(soaking women are never a bad thing). Soaking wet, they all went to Mc D. "Ba-da-pa-pa-pa, he's lovin it."
The next memorable event.....lets see.........Hari Keusahawanan. He had an "apparantly" simple task, he says apparantly here because the task wasnt as simple as he thought it was. Pearls. Those damn pearls. The Bloody Curse of the Black Pearl. Starring Albert Kamahlendra, Goh Boon Han, and cute harmless little black bubble tea pearls. To make a painfully long story short, Boon Han shirked his responsibility of helping Albert make the pearls(even when the shopkeeper explicitly told them both that it required TWO pairs of hands) and therefore leaving Albert to handle everything in a 6 am mad rush resulting in stubburn pearls that refuse to seperate like bloody balanced electrons(huh?). So yeah, it was Boon Han's fault. Mostly.
And then there was the world cup. It is sad when, the world cup became a showcase of defensive football instead of attacking. But Germany were undoubtedly Albert's favourite. But of course, he was, like any other pathetic England fan. Crouch as striker. That is a joke. Theo more than deserved a chance. And Italy should NOT have won. But hey, Australia wouldnt have gone far if even if they beat Italy like they shouldve. But he did predict that Ronaldinho wouldnt do well in the world cup. Honestly, Brazil were a mess. Happy to see them in a mess.
Next up, Albert's blogging renaissance. Ever since his disastrous attempt at blogging in a 1st person perspective, full of spelling mistakes, and desperately lacking of wit, he gave up on it all together. So he relieved himself of all blogging duties, and delegated it to his alternate personality(yours truly). His 1st major break, "Winds of Change, Fast, Furious and Swift Indeed" received the kind of inspiring feedback as follows:
"hahahahahhahah!!!!man, the story of my life!!! dude, u got one funny blog!!!!!! haha, this right here could be book award winning stuff!!! ahahhahaha, peace man, peace!!!!! you really lifted my day bro, real good shit here!!!! such a drama queen dei!!! hahahahaha, peace........." -Gavin.
Ignore the profanity. But really, Gavin here was the guy that made it all worthwhile. He loves Gavin. And his biceps.
There you have it, 3 highlights of his year(admitedly, he skimped on some details). Now, for the awards & accolades.
BEST SONG OF THE YEAR: "i write sins not tragedies" Although their songs and their song titles have to co-relation whatsoever, they are still very much, a welcome breath of fresh air.
BEST TV SHOW: "Lost" and "Jack & Bobby". Due to indecisiveness, they both shall be nominated. Lost was at the beginning of the season weavering in their plot, it seemed to be going nowhere, but simply was saved by a masterly stroke of brilliance to turn the tables on John "it is your destiny" Locke and Dr "tortured conscience" Jack to put Sawyer in control at the island. He loves Sawyer. "Jack & Bobby" too is quite ingenious by taking us into the lives of the future president and his family in his teens. Engaging characters, intelligent plot, and most of all, a witty script that treats its audience like proper intellectuals. Who wouldnt love it? Lost edges this one.
A moment of silence as we pay our respects to a great tv show that has gone rotten, "Alias". A pregnant double agent doesnt go down well with most people.
BEST BOOK: " The Importance of Living" by Lin Yu Tang. This book was unearthed by Albert a few weeks ago. It was 1st published in 1937. It was his grandfather's book. This book, is on the philosophy of this chinese dude, who probably is already dead. It covers everything from Sex Appeal to The Art of Sitting to Flower Arrangements. Everything you would want to know about life is in this ancient text. Lin Yu Tang, is akin to the proverbial wise man on the mountain, hes got more answers than Google. (It is an English book,in case youre wondering.)
PERSONALITY OF THE YEAR: SuPeRsTaR aka Mansi. There is an entire tribute to her in one of Albert's previous postings. This girl is a revelation to MSN messaging. She is intelligent, witty, and Albert's current personality of the year. For proof, refer to his Shoutout on friendster and the posting "whats that he hears".
PERSON OF THE YEAR: Azhar. Undoubtedly, the greatest guy Albert has come to befriend. He is still sorely missed back at school, but he has now moved on to better things at some fancy boarding school. An ardent Manutd fan, he is the only football-punditing adversary that Albert can indulge in proper footballing debates in defending their respective supported football clubs, appart from "talk to the hand" moments. Sarcastic, acidic humour, delightfully witty, and especially endearing when he blushes, Albert still stands firm in his belief that if Azhar were a girl, he'd fall in love with him/her. Gosh, that must be awkward.
Ahem, moving on swiftly now, (if your eyes can still endure the visual abuse) lets us begin on resolutions.
1. Losing another 5 kgs. Well, last year he lost 5kgs, and even went down 3 dress sizes, so it shouldnt be as difficult as it seems.
2. Making Gavin jealous of Albert's arms.
3. Reastablishing his credibility through yet another brain draining exam. The biggie, SPM.
4. Figuring out exactly what he wants to do with his life.
5. Improving his spelling.
6. Learning how to reload a phone(he only just got a phone, so give him a break).
7. Keeping in touch with all his schoolmates, they are far too precious to let slip.
8. Not having a nervous breakdown when school inevitably ends.
9. Not cutting his hair until the year is over.
And last and probably the least,
10. Finishing Pn. Han's Add Math project, which is 2 months overdue.
And this time, he is definately going to fulfill all his New Year resolutions, except maybe, the last one.
You know, the last few days of a year, after Christmas festivities and before the New Year havoc, is simply perfect for just staying idle, doing absolutely nothing. In this sort of mood, he would just reflect on the past year, being in a state of sentimental reminiscencing. So on that note let us give our mouse scrollers a good workout, and skew our delicate eyeballs with over excessive exposures to a plethora of screen glares. Enjoy.
The 2006 started of for Albert on a relatively good note, barring his parents' repeated attempts to enroll him into Catholic High, which is a VERY bad thing, just ask Hema. Fresh from a 7A PMR result, somewhat restored a bit more credibility to himslef. But that in no way prepared him for Add Math. All the horror stories which seemed then slightly exaggerated now did not even put paid to the terror of Add Math.
And then there was his 1st trip to MacDonalds. He was 16. Dont ask. Him and his classmates were audaciously attempting to paint his beloved class 4 sn 1. They managed the painting part. But the cleaning part, was more of a lets-see-how-much-we-can-flood-the-school-before-we-get-in-trouble sorta thing. By "we", he means "them". Although he didnt want to get involved, he inevitably got wet in a girls-gone-wild/wet fest; much to his delight(soaking women are never a bad thing). Soaking wet, they all went to Mc D. "Ba-da-pa-pa-pa, he's lovin it."
The next memorable event.....lets see.........Hari Keusahawanan. He had an "apparantly" simple task, he says apparantly here because the task wasnt as simple as he thought it was. Pearls. Those damn pearls. The Bloody Curse of the Black Pearl. Starring Albert Kamahlendra, Goh Boon Han, and cute harmless little black bubble tea pearls. To make a painfully long story short, Boon Han shirked his responsibility of helping Albert make the pearls(even when the shopkeeper explicitly told them both that it required TWO pairs of hands) and therefore leaving Albert to handle everything in a 6 am mad rush resulting in stubburn pearls that refuse to seperate like bloody balanced electrons(huh?). So yeah, it was Boon Han's fault. Mostly.
And then there was the world cup. It is sad when, the world cup became a showcase of defensive football instead of attacking. But Germany were undoubtedly Albert's favourite. But of course, he was, like any other pathetic England fan. Crouch as striker. That is a joke. Theo more than deserved a chance. And Italy should NOT have won. But hey, Australia wouldnt have gone far if even if they beat Italy like they shouldve. But he did predict that Ronaldinho wouldnt do well in the world cup. Honestly, Brazil were a mess. Happy to see them in a mess.
Next up, Albert's blogging renaissance. Ever since his disastrous attempt at blogging in a 1st person perspective, full of spelling mistakes, and desperately lacking of wit, he gave up on it all together. So he relieved himself of all blogging duties, and delegated it to his alternate personality(yours truly). His 1st major break, "Winds of Change, Fast, Furious and Swift Indeed" received the kind of inspiring feedback as follows:
"hahahahahhahah!!!!man, the story of my life!!! dude, u got one funny blog!!!!!! haha, this right here could be book award winning stuff!!! ahahhahaha, peace man, peace!!!!! you really lifted my day bro, real good shit here!!!! such a drama queen dei!!! hahahahaha, peace........." -Gavin.
Ignore the profanity. But really, Gavin here was the guy that made it all worthwhile. He loves Gavin. And his biceps.
There you have it, 3 highlights of his year(admitedly, he skimped on some details). Now, for the awards & accolades.
BEST SONG OF THE YEAR: "i write sins not tragedies" Although their songs and their song titles have to co-relation whatsoever, they are still very much, a welcome breath of fresh air.
BEST TV SHOW: "Lost" and "Jack & Bobby". Due to indecisiveness, they both shall be nominated. Lost was at the beginning of the season weavering in their plot, it seemed to be going nowhere, but simply was saved by a masterly stroke of brilliance to turn the tables on John "it is your destiny" Locke and Dr "tortured conscience" Jack to put Sawyer in control at the island. He loves Sawyer. "Jack & Bobby" too is quite ingenious by taking us into the lives of the future president and his family in his teens. Engaging characters, intelligent plot, and most of all, a witty script that treats its audience like proper intellectuals. Who wouldnt love it? Lost edges this one.
A moment of silence as we pay our respects to a great tv show that has gone rotten, "Alias". A pregnant double agent doesnt go down well with most people.
BEST BOOK: " The Importance of Living" by Lin Yu Tang. This book was unearthed by Albert a few weeks ago. It was 1st published in 1937. It was his grandfather's book. This book, is on the philosophy of this chinese dude, who probably is already dead. It covers everything from Sex Appeal to The Art of Sitting to Flower Arrangements. Everything you would want to know about life is in this ancient text. Lin Yu Tang, is akin to the proverbial wise man on the mountain, hes got more answers than Google. (It is an English book,in case youre wondering.)
PERSONALITY OF THE YEAR: SuPeRsTaR aka Mansi. There is an entire tribute to her in one of Albert's previous postings. This girl is a revelation to MSN messaging. She is intelligent, witty, and Albert's current personality of the year. For proof, refer to his Shoutout on friendster and the posting "whats that he hears".
PERSON OF THE YEAR: Azhar. Undoubtedly, the greatest guy Albert has come to befriend. He is still sorely missed back at school, but he has now moved on to better things at some fancy boarding school. An ardent Manutd fan, he is the only football-punditing adversary that Albert can indulge in proper footballing debates in defending their respective supported football clubs, appart from "talk to the hand" moments. Sarcastic, acidic humour, delightfully witty, and especially endearing when he blushes, Albert still stands firm in his belief that if Azhar were a girl, he'd fall in love with him/her. Gosh, that must be awkward.
Ahem, moving on swiftly now, (if your eyes can still endure the visual abuse) lets us begin on resolutions.
1. Losing another 5 kgs. Well, last year he lost 5kgs, and even went down 3 dress sizes, so it shouldnt be as difficult as it seems.
2. Making Gavin jealous of Albert's arms.
3. Reastablishing his credibility through yet another brain draining exam. The biggie, SPM.
4. Figuring out exactly what he wants to do with his life.
5. Improving his spelling.
6. Learning how to reload a phone(he only just got a phone, so give him a break).
7. Keeping in touch with all his schoolmates, they are far too precious to let slip.
8. Not having a nervous breakdown when school inevitably ends.
9. Not cutting his hair until the year is over.
And last and probably the least,
10. Finishing Pn. Han's Add Math project, which is 2 months overdue.
And this time, he is definately going to fulfill all his New Year resolutions, except maybe, the last one.
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Post Christmas Post-Mortem
7 birds of chicken. 6 kg of mutton. 5 bags of flour. 4 family members. 3 consecutive days of shopping. 2 narrating personalities. ONE MISSION: Christmas.
( the following post mortem may contain extremely typical and corny details)
First thing's first. Albert must beg your forgiveness for not blogging last week. Also for the last angst-ridden, pre-christmas depression tainted posting. He forgot about Christmas food. Hence, Christmas was a blast.
Well, he has been really busy these past few days. Helping out in the cooking really. But he didnt cook of course, festive dishes are way out of his league, eventhough he can cook. Owh no. Festive dishes are in a class of their own compared to day-to-day cooking. In his mother's class to be specific. When she really cooks, like during a special occasion like this, she SERIOUSLY cooks. Your familiar Indian meat dishes are elevated to heights only a true connoisseur can scale. People like Albert can only dream he could cook like his mom. Wanna know how its like to work in a pressure-cooker kitchen where speed and only the best will do, huh?
Huge amounts of steam billowly rises as the Master Chef punishes the wok with the heavy whippings of her ladle. "Tomato," she utters in a authoritative tone.
The Kitchen boy ignores the perspiration trickling down his face, he instinctively grabs a tomato, removes the pith skillfully with a knife, chops it, and hands it to the Master Chef. Tension freezes the muscles in his face, as the Master chef scans the tomatos, knowing exactly what to look for, and what shouldnt be there. She dumps it into the gurgling curry. Without a word. He heaves a sigh of relief, and has a total of 2 seconds to compose himself, before he is faced with another task demanding more precision and speed.
This goes on for a couple of days, until all cooking were finished. But he has to say, the Devil curry packed more of a punch than a certain football team that goes by similar a name. Just sucking on that piece of mutton bone, feeling every bit like his ancestral predescesors. The bone marrow was simply devine. Truly an Indian delicacy. The curry was fantastic too, especially since she ditched her usual health consciousness and decided for sinful delights like the ones Albert enjoyed. Only once a year, such food. Sigh.
Then of course, was church. There was this 200 strong choir, who gave Albert repeated goosebumps when they sang every song with with a certain devine grandeur. Now this is how you deliver the Christmas message.
So what did he get for Christmas? Nothing actually. But he has many things to be thankful for. His hair for instance. It has never been this long in his entire life. Which is a good thing. And he can keep it this long. Until school of course. And if you followed the previous post, you would know that his mum was trying to switch his school. But the whole thing seems like its going to fall through(not gonna happen). Something about the policy of the other school. Or whatever, he is just happy that he gets to finish his last year at SS17. And he cant wait to get back to school.
And, before he starts getting sentimental, he has to restrain himself, because in the next post he shall give his faithfull readers a recap of the whole year, and his new year resolution, and it will be the longest thing ever, so for now, Happy New Year 2007!!
7 birds of chicken. 6 kg of mutton. 5 bags of flour. 4 family members. 3 consecutive days of shopping. 2 narrating personalities. ONE MISSION: Christmas.
( the following post mortem may contain extremely typical and corny details)
First thing's first. Albert must beg your forgiveness for not blogging last week. Also for the last angst-ridden, pre-christmas depression tainted posting. He forgot about Christmas food. Hence, Christmas was a blast.
Well, he has been really busy these past few days. Helping out in the cooking really. But he didnt cook of course, festive dishes are way out of his league, eventhough he can cook. Owh no. Festive dishes are in a class of their own compared to day-to-day cooking. In his mother's class to be specific. When she really cooks, like during a special occasion like this, she SERIOUSLY cooks. Your familiar Indian meat dishes are elevated to heights only a true connoisseur can scale. People like Albert can only dream he could cook like his mom. Wanna know how its like to work in a pressure-cooker kitchen where speed and only the best will do, huh?
Huge amounts of steam billowly rises as the Master Chef punishes the wok with the heavy whippings of her ladle. "Tomato," she utters in a authoritative tone.
The Kitchen boy ignores the perspiration trickling down his face, he instinctively grabs a tomato, removes the pith skillfully with a knife, chops it, and hands it to the Master Chef. Tension freezes the muscles in his face, as the Master chef scans the tomatos, knowing exactly what to look for, and what shouldnt be there. She dumps it into the gurgling curry. Without a word. He heaves a sigh of relief, and has a total of 2 seconds to compose himself, before he is faced with another task demanding more precision and speed.
This goes on for a couple of days, until all cooking were finished. But he has to say, the Devil curry packed more of a punch than a certain football team that goes by similar a name. Just sucking on that piece of mutton bone, feeling every bit like his ancestral predescesors. The bone marrow was simply devine. Truly an Indian delicacy. The curry was fantastic too, especially since she ditched her usual health consciousness and decided for sinful delights like the ones Albert enjoyed. Only once a year, such food. Sigh.
Then of course, was church. There was this 200 strong choir, who gave Albert repeated goosebumps when they sang every song with with a certain devine grandeur. Now this is how you deliver the Christmas message.
So what did he get for Christmas? Nothing actually. But he has many things to be thankful for. His hair for instance. It has never been this long in his entire life. Which is a good thing. And he can keep it this long. Until school of course. And if you followed the previous post, you would know that his mum was trying to switch his school. But the whole thing seems like its going to fall through(not gonna happen). Something about the policy of the other school. Or whatever, he is just happy that he gets to finish his last year at SS17. And he cant wait to get back to school.
And, before he starts getting sentimental, he has to restrain himself, because in the next post he shall give his faithfull readers a recap of the whole year, and his new year resolution, and it will be the longest thing ever, so for now, Happy New Year 2007!!
Friday, December 15, 2006
"Im having me, a blue, christmas....."
Its that time of the year again, the most hyped up festive season of the year. The smell of money fills the air, as businesses cashes in on all the last minute shopping, and of course, that fat man in the red-suit will start making appearances on TV, malls, and basically anywhere that will support the weight of this obese bugger. Ah, its Christmas time. Again.
Dont get Albert wrong, he is all excited about Christmas. OK, maybe not really. Alright he isnt in anyway interested in the whole elaborate charade that has become of Christmas. But if you do celebrate Christmas, are you really excited about something you've been doing the exact same way every year? Oh well, who is he kidding anyway, its Christmas, of course you people would be beside yourself with anticipation, and if you are, you would'nt in the slightest way be out of place. Well, Albert used to be like you.
He remembers being that bright eyed 7 year old who got all excited about the 30 year old Christmas tree that has become a family heirloom. Decorating it, whilst breaking something in the process. Baking the cookies. Helping out in the kitchen(yeah, cooking used to be a real thrill for him). Coming down the stairs on Christmas day, spotting the presents under the tree, "accidentally" opening his brother's present. All the people that came by his house on that day, and the "ang pou"s he'd get. That was fun. That used to be fun.
Nowadays, it just turns into a weary sense of repetitive dejavu. Its like people who sort of turn back time and relive their day. And they would be able predict everything right before it happens. Just that feeling of being just very detached from it all, and it just happens around you, but you feel alien to it all, like you just dont understand why everyone is cheery and excited, or maybe they are faking it just like how you are, because you just dont want to put a damper on their jolly spirits.
Every year its the same thing. The most annoying reoccurance is probably the tv shows. Those stupid, stupid Christamas tv shows. All pretentiously driving home the message of the "true spirit of Christmas" through stories revolving around an obese stranger in a red suit with an obnoxious laugh forcing himself down your chimney in the middle of the night to drop of presents under your Christmas tree. Sorta like an eccentric DHL man. With an obnoxious laugh. Owh yeah, your suppose to leave him milk and cookies too. Somewhere along these lines lies the "true spirit of Christmas". For goodness sake, if anyone wanted to know the true meaning of Christmas, they, would, go, to, church. Unless of course, they are too busy watching those stupid, stupid, Christmas tv shows. He hates national tv.
Alright, enough Santa bashing. Its just that Santa best represents the misrepresentation of Christmas. But thats not really the problem. Not entirely.
At the time of this posting, there is exactly 10 days to Christmas. In between, there will be all that cooking and cleaning and baking. He will practically go on auto-pilot mode, that is the ONLY way to survive Christmas. On Christmas, he shall hide in the kitchen to avoid any sort of adult conversation, he doesnt know about you, but the adults he knows, are witless, dull, boring conversationalists. They suck the very life out of you. If they at least "compensate" it with money in packets, it wont be half as bad, but it seems that somewhere along the line they just stopped giving anything. What happened to the THEIR Christmas spirit?!! Alright, so Albert is guilty of losing his Christmas cheer too. But can you blame him?
Well, he isnt exactly against the whole idea of Christmas. Its just this whole elaborate charade, is just weighing down on his spirits. Well, at least, no matter how down he gets, he can always look forward to school aint it? Not this time. His mom is hell bent on changing his school, she came close last year, it seems she might actually finish the job this year. Its amazing how you can take certain things for granted, and only realize its true value in your life once you've lost it. Yeah, bummer.
So theres is absolutely nothing for him this Christmas. But dont let him put a damper on your Christmas. He's sure all you guys are gonna have one heck of a Christmas.
Soo.
Yeah.
Whatever, Merry Christmas to you too.
Its that time of the year again, the most hyped up festive season of the year. The smell of money fills the air, as businesses cashes in on all the last minute shopping, and of course, that fat man in the red-suit will start making appearances on TV, malls, and basically anywhere that will support the weight of this obese bugger. Ah, its Christmas time. Again.
Dont get Albert wrong, he is all excited about Christmas. OK, maybe not really. Alright he isnt in anyway interested in the whole elaborate charade that has become of Christmas. But if you do celebrate Christmas, are you really excited about something you've been doing the exact same way every year? Oh well, who is he kidding anyway, its Christmas, of course you people would be beside yourself with anticipation, and if you are, you would'nt in the slightest way be out of place. Well, Albert used to be like you.
He remembers being that bright eyed 7 year old who got all excited about the 30 year old Christmas tree that has become a family heirloom. Decorating it, whilst breaking something in the process. Baking the cookies. Helping out in the kitchen(yeah, cooking used to be a real thrill for him). Coming down the stairs on Christmas day, spotting the presents under the tree, "accidentally" opening his brother's present. All the people that came by his house on that day, and the "ang pou"s he'd get. That was fun. That used to be fun.
Nowadays, it just turns into a weary sense of repetitive dejavu. Its like people who sort of turn back time and relive their day. And they would be able predict everything right before it happens. Just that feeling of being just very detached from it all, and it just happens around you, but you feel alien to it all, like you just dont understand why everyone is cheery and excited, or maybe they are faking it just like how you are, because you just dont want to put a damper on their jolly spirits.
Every year its the same thing. The most annoying reoccurance is probably the tv shows. Those stupid, stupid Christamas tv shows. All pretentiously driving home the message of the "true spirit of Christmas" through stories revolving around an obese stranger in a red suit with an obnoxious laugh forcing himself down your chimney in the middle of the night to drop of presents under your Christmas tree. Sorta like an eccentric DHL man. With an obnoxious laugh. Owh yeah, your suppose to leave him milk and cookies too. Somewhere along these lines lies the "true spirit of Christmas". For goodness sake, if anyone wanted to know the true meaning of Christmas, they, would, go, to, church. Unless of course, they are too busy watching those stupid, stupid, Christmas tv shows. He hates national tv.
Alright, enough Santa bashing. Its just that Santa best represents the misrepresentation of Christmas. But thats not really the problem. Not entirely.
At the time of this posting, there is exactly 10 days to Christmas. In between, there will be all that cooking and cleaning and baking. He will practically go on auto-pilot mode, that is the ONLY way to survive Christmas. On Christmas, he shall hide in the kitchen to avoid any sort of adult conversation, he doesnt know about you, but the adults he knows, are witless, dull, boring conversationalists. They suck the very life out of you. If they at least "compensate" it with money in packets, it wont be half as bad, but it seems that somewhere along the line they just stopped giving anything. What happened to the THEIR Christmas spirit?!! Alright, so Albert is guilty of losing his Christmas cheer too. But can you blame him?
Well, he isnt exactly against the whole idea of Christmas. Its just this whole elaborate charade, is just weighing down on his spirits. Well, at least, no matter how down he gets, he can always look forward to school aint it? Not this time. His mom is hell bent on changing his school, she came close last year, it seems she might actually finish the job this year. Its amazing how you can take certain things for granted, and only realize its true value in your life once you've lost it. Yeah, bummer.
So theres is absolutely nothing for him this Christmas. But dont let him put a damper on your Christmas. He's sure all you guys are gonna have one heck of a Christmas.
Soo.
Yeah.
Whatever, Merry Christmas to you too.
Monday, December 11, 2006
Senior's party
Yeah, Albert knows what your're thinking. Another party. But hey, Manishya asked him to go, and you really dont say no to a gal like that.
Alright, straight to the main event shall we. Well, the weather was predictably overcast. He did some walking before entering the lobby of Lakeview Club. He was already going over all the superlatives he was gonna use to describe the girl that would be waiting at the reception. He found out later that it really wouldnt matter.
He strolled in, hoping he didnt walk into the wrong building, considering his terrible sense of direction, then he saw Shannon, who gave him his ticket. Manishya's familiar voice came from somewhere telling him to have a seat at the lobby , he didnt really notice her, alredy making his way to the lobby. He sat heavily, and was suddenly overcome with nervousness.
As he was playing with his handphone, he glimpsed a pair of gorgoues legs sprouting from 3 inch heels, he looked up to see the owner of those legs. He didnt deserve the sight, but there it was, in all her glory, fitted into a tight, tiny black, glittery dress. She flashed him a smile, he looked on stupefied. Time grinded to a halt, his heart skipped a beat(maybe more), white noice filled his brain, it was as tho the very spirit of every male that ever acknowledged the highest form aesthetic beauty that is the female culminated in this very moment, this blip in the fabric of time through all eternity. With such a burden on Albert's back to express this into a sentence that includes adjectives and superlatives that was due to the Godsent creature in front him, what does he say?
"I..I...you..you...look....WHOA!!!"
Inspirational indeed.
So as he tried patheticly to make conversation while his mind was still in a state of flux, people filled the room, and finally Albert too went into the room, just feeling the blood finally flow back into his brain. As he entered the room, the song "Promiscuos" was playing in the background. He felt the hair on the back of his neck stand.( refer to previous post "Take The Lead, Please; about dancing)
As people were filling up the room, he started to feel somewhat out of place being the only 4th former. Then Raveen provided some much needed company. He appreciated that. Then the DJ announced that the food was ready to be savaged, and he dint have to say twice. So Albert ate, exchanged pleasentries while at it, and got brutally attacked by 2 man utd fans, Ashvin and Manishya. Its true what they say, a man is at his weakest when he is full. Well, all you Man Utd fans, I'll tell you, it wont be long before Chelsea climb back on top, that's for SURE.
And then, the dance floor opened. And so he joined everyone in on the dancefloor, only after Manishya dragged him out there. The lyrics were full of colourful language, strange analogies or metaphors(milk the cow, milkshake, humps) and other more, ahem direct ones. But hey, its about the music right?
Eventually he broke away from the crowd and huddled in a corner. He then spotted a gal sitting behind this barlike longish table with a high stool. She was cute. He told himself that if he had the balls he'd just be able to walk up to her and strike up a conversation with this gal who was seemingly bored. He forgot about her as he followed Manishya to the bar, she was getting herself a Margarita, and it was interesting to watch the bartender doing his stuff. Then, following her, he went to the exact place where the gal was sitting, and sitting between him and the gal was Ashvin. In front of Albert was Manishya, whom he was sharing the drink with. It was too strong for him, and considering it was a "ladies" drink, he cant imagine what a "macho" drink would taste like.
Then Ashvin and Manishya scooted off to the dance floor, and it was only him and the gal there. For a while he didnt say anything, just soaking in the atmosphere. Then their eyes met. She smiled at him, and he returned the gesture. And the rest they say, is history. They introduced each other, her name was Trishantini. And they made what little conversation they could with the music blazing, making it hard to even think. And she asked for his number.
Score.
Touchdown.
Whatever man, who da man, who da man??!!
After that, the atmosphere started to mellow, and it was midnight already. People started to leave. People were taking pictures. He took one with Manishya.
And then, he had to leave. But before, he took a look, just one last look, at you-probably-know-who.
Yeah, Albert knows what your're thinking. Another party. But hey, Manishya asked him to go, and you really dont say no to a gal like that.
Alright, straight to the main event shall we. Well, the weather was predictably overcast. He did some walking before entering the lobby of Lakeview Club. He was already going over all the superlatives he was gonna use to describe the girl that would be waiting at the reception. He found out later that it really wouldnt matter.
He strolled in, hoping he didnt walk into the wrong building, considering his terrible sense of direction, then he saw Shannon, who gave him his ticket. Manishya's familiar voice came from somewhere telling him to have a seat at the lobby , he didnt really notice her, alredy making his way to the lobby. He sat heavily, and was suddenly overcome with nervousness.
As he was playing with his handphone, he glimpsed a pair of gorgoues legs sprouting from 3 inch heels, he looked up to see the owner of those legs. He didnt deserve the sight, but there it was, in all her glory, fitted into a tight, tiny black, glittery dress. She flashed him a smile, he looked on stupefied. Time grinded to a halt, his heart skipped a beat(maybe more), white noice filled his brain, it was as tho the very spirit of every male that ever acknowledged the highest form aesthetic beauty that is the female culminated in this very moment, this blip in the fabric of time through all eternity. With such a burden on Albert's back to express this into a sentence that includes adjectives and superlatives that was due to the Godsent creature in front him, what does he say?
"I..I...you..you...look....WHOA!!!"
Inspirational indeed.
So as he tried patheticly to make conversation while his mind was still in a state of flux, people filled the room, and finally Albert too went into the room, just feeling the blood finally flow back into his brain. As he entered the room, the song "Promiscuos" was playing in the background. He felt the hair on the back of his neck stand.( refer to previous post "Take The Lead, Please; about dancing)
As people were filling up the room, he started to feel somewhat out of place being the only 4th former. Then Raveen provided some much needed company. He appreciated that. Then the DJ announced that the food was ready to be savaged, and he dint have to say twice. So Albert ate, exchanged pleasentries while at it, and got brutally attacked by 2 man utd fans, Ashvin and Manishya. Its true what they say, a man is at his weakest when he is full. Well, all you Man Utd fans, I'll tell you, it wont be long before Chelsea climb back on top, that's for SURE.
And then, the dance floor opened. And so he joined everyone in on the dancefloor, only after Manishya dragged him out there. The lyrics were full of colourful language, strange analogies or metaphors(milk the cow, milkshake, humps) and other more, ahem direct ones. But hey, its about the music right?
Eventually he broke away from the crowd and huddled in a corner. He then spotted a gal sitting behind this barlike longish table with a high stool. She was cute. He told himself that if he had the balls he'd just be able to walk up to her and strike up a conversation with this gal who was seemingly bored. He forgot about her as he followed Manishya to the bar, she was getting herself a Margarita, and it was interesting to watch the bartender doing his stuff. Then, following her, he went to the exact place where the gal was sitting, and sitting between him and the gal was Ashvin. In front of Albert was Manishya, whom he was sharing the drink with. It was too strong for him, and considering it was a "ladies" drink, he cant imagine what a "macho" drink would taste like.
Then Ashvin and Manishya scooted off to the dance floor, and it was only him and the gal there. For a while he didnt say anything, just soaking in the atmosphere. Then their eyes met. She smiled at him, and he returned the gesture. And the rest they say, is history. They introduced each other, her name was Trishantini. And they made what little conversation they could with the music blazing, making it hard to even think. And she asked for his number.
Score.
Touchdown.
Whatever man, who da man, who da man??!!
After that, the atmosphere started to mellow, and it was midnight already. People started to leave. People were taking pictures. He took one with Manishya.
And then, he had to leave. But before, he took a look, just one last look, at you-probably-know-who.
B.E.A.T.S.
So Albert was thinking yeah, just stringing random thoughts into ideas, when he stumbles upon this cool idea. Its like when a moment of inspiration comes over you, an impetus, giving birth to great ideas and such. Well, he was thinking about the idea of a band, now check this out:
B:Boon, bassist
E:Evan, drummer
A:Albert, cant play anything, so its vocalist then
T:Tim, guitarist
S:Sam, keyboardist
Beats. Sounds original, especially since its an acronym. Its all really nice, but theres a small problem, Albert cant sing. Yeah, small problem.
But hey, it all fits soo nicely together, what the heck if Albert cant sing. Of course, they could get another person whose name starts with an "A", and who could actually sing. But for the sake of this blog posting lets just assume that there is absolutely nobody whose name starts with an "A" and who can also sing.
Maybe, they could follow in the footsteps of the band Ask Me Again, maybe even surpass them. They might even gain a loyal following. They would do numerous gigs everywhere and be soo much in demand that they would temporarily forget about getting an actual job. They'ed be the hottest thing in KL, or Bangsar and some say Batam(wherever the hell that is).
Then they would release their 1st album, under Sony BMG. Their 1st single, "Beats Me", becomes their breakthru song, hits No.1 everwhere, and every music station will be playing it(even the tamil ones). Critics will be hailing B.E.A.T.S. as the best thing to happen to Malaysian music:
"They're soo good, they just cant be local!!"
"Their infectious tunes and clever lyrics will leave you with involuntary dance movements and lip sync-ing"
"Cuba sekali, pasti mau lagi!"
Rave reviews indeed.
Then their breakthru in the international scene will come with their 2nd single, "Beat it", followed up by "Beat You Up" and the phenomenal success of the song "Beat-rice". Fame, fortune, and everything else falls in the laps of B.E.A.T.S. members. Also a chunk of musical history too.
But first, singing lessons of course.
So Albert was thinking yeah, just stringing random thoughts into ideas, when he stumbles upon this cool idea. Its like when a moment of inspiration comes over you, an impetus, giving birth to great ideas and such. Well, he was thinking about the idea of a band, now check this out:
B:Boon, bassist
E:Evan, drummer
A:Albert, cant play anything, so its vocalist then
T:Tim, guitarist
S:Sam, keyboardist
Beats. Sounds original, especially since its an acronym. Its all really nice, but theres a small problem, Albert cant sing. Yeah, small problem.
But hey, it all fits soo nicely together, what the heck if Albert cant sing. Of course, they could get another person whose name starts with an "A", and who could actually sing. But for the sake of this blog posting lets just assume that there is absolutely nobody whose name starts with an "A" and who can also sing.
Maybe, they could follow in the footsteps of the band Ask Me Again, maybe even surpass them. They might even gain a loyal following. They would do numerous gigs everywhere and be soo much in demand that they would temporarily forget about getting an actual job. They'ed be the hottest thing in KL, or Bangsar and some say Batam(wherever the hell that is).
Then they would release their 1st album, under Sony BMG. Their 1st single, "Beats Me", becomes their breakthru song, hits No.1 everwhere, and every music station will be playing it(even the tamil ones). Critics will be hailing B.E.A.T.S. as the best thing to happen to Malaysian music:
"They're soo good, they just cant be local!!"
"Their infectious tunes and clever lyrics will leave you with involuntary dance movements and lip sync-ing"
"Cuba sekali, pasti mau lagi!"
Rave reviews indeed.
Then their breakthru in the international scene will come with their 2nd single, "Beat it", followed up by "Beat You Up" and the phenomenal success of the song "Beat-rice". Fame, fortune, and everything else falls in the laps of B.E.A.T.S. members. Also a chunk of musical history too.
But first, singing lessons of course.
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