Sunday, August 23, 2026

The Man Who Can't Be Moved

"Going back to the corner where I first saw you 
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move 
Got some words on cardboard, got your picture in my hand 
Saying, "If you see this girl, can you tell her where I am?" 

The radio crackled softly from the corner of the room. Albert had heard the song enough times that he could sing along to most of it, although he would later deny this under oath.18 year old Albert was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling, doing what 18 year old Albert considered a perfectly productive afternoon.

He was not studying. He was not doing his homework. He was, in fact, doing absolutely nothing. He was thinking about the future. Not seriously, of course. At 18, the future was a vague and distant concept involving university, money, freedom and hot girls. Marriage was definitely not part of the plan. Marriage, Albert had decided, was for other people. People who enjoyed sharing food. People who didn't mind having someone constantly asking where they were going. People who voluntarily gave another human being permission to know what they were doing at all times. 

Absolutely not. 

Albert was going to remain single. Forever. He had just reached what he considered a particularly profound conclusion when someone knocked on his bedroom door. Albert didn't move. 

“Come in.” The door opened. A man walked in. Albert sat up. The stranger looked to be in his mid-thirties(this stranger was actually 38 but can pass for a 32 year old easily). He had slightly messy hair, a tired expression and the unmistakable air of someone who had spent the morning dealing with problems that were not his fault (not entirely). He stood in the doorway and stared at Albert. Albert stared back. Neither spoke. 

Finally, Albert said: “Who are you?” 

The man sighed. “This is going to be harder than I thought.” 

The man looked around the room. The books. The mess. The old radio. Then he looked back at Albert.

“I'm Albert.” 

Albert frowned. “No, you're not.” 

“I am.” 

 “I'm Albert.” 

  “Yes.” 

 “So you're...” 

  “Albert.” 

Albert stared at him. The man stared back. 

“You're me?” 

“Unfortunately.” 

 Albert got off the bed. 

“That is impossible.” 

“I know. I am you, 20 years from now.” 

“Are you my future self?” 

Albert looked him up and down. There was a long pause. 

“Wow.” 

“What?” 

 “You look 32 at most. So I age well huh? You look tired though.” 

The older Albert laughed. 

“You have no idea.” 

The song continued playing quietly behind them. Albert tried to disprove the man's identity. He was an impostor. A prank. An actor. A particularly strange government experiment. Possibly an alien. Eventually, the older Albert produced a piece of paper. On it were several things only Albert could possibly know. Embarrassing things. Very embarrassing things. Albert read them. His expression changed. He looked at the man again. 

“Okay. You're me. But why are you here?”

The older Albert sat down. 

“That is a very good question.” 

He looked at his younger self. Then he smiled. 

“I'm here to tell you something about your future.” 

 Albert raised an eyebrow. 

“What?” 

“You're going to meet someone very important. She will change your life. You will fall in love.” 

There was silence. Then Albert burst out laughing. Not a polite laugh. The embarassing kind where you snort a little. 

“Me?” 

“Yes.” 

“In love?” 

“Yes.” 

“To a girl?” 

“That's generally how it works if you are straight. Which you are.”

 “I'm not sure if I believe you. But out of curiousity, who is she?” 

Older Albert's expression softened. 

“Someone wonderful. She's a warrior princess, conquerer of mountains and this thing that has not been invented yet called Hyrox.” 

“That's vague.” 

Most importantly, she makes you laugh.” 

 Albert grinned. 

“Smart girl?” 

“She is.” 

“Pretty?” 

“Very.” 

 Albert paused. 

“Does she like me?” 

Older Albert looked at him. 

“You love each other” 

 The laughter disappeared from Albert's face.

“She really loves me?” 

“Yes.” 

“What is she like?” 

Older Albert thought for a moment. 

“She's the person you don't have to perform for.” 

 Albert frowned. 

“What does that mean?” 

“You spend a lot of your life trying to be interesting. Funny. Impressive. You collect stories because you want people to remember you but with her, you don't need any of that. You can just be Albert.” 

 The room fell quiet. The song on the radio was nearly over. Albert looked at the older version of himself. 

“When do I meet her?” 

“You'll know.” 

“Tell me her name.”

“No.”


 “Why?”

“Because if I tell you, you'll spend the rest of your life looking for her.”


 “Wouldn't that be easier?”

“No.”


 “Why?”

Older Albert stood.

“Its important you don't take any shortcuts, you have to experience it all, the good and the bad, before you find her. Because the best things in your life aren't supposed to happen because you hunted them down. It doesn't work any other way.” 

Older Albert walked toward the door. 

“They happen while you're busy living.” 

 Albert followed him.

 “Wait.” 

The older man turned. 

“Do I become successful?” 

“Depends what you mean by successful.” 

“Happy?” 

The older Albert paused. Then smiled. 

“Sometimes.” 

 Albert laughed. 

“That's not very reassuring.” 

“It isn't supposed to be.” 

He opened the door. 

“You're going to lose people. Make mistakes. Embarrass yourself. Make decisions you regret.” 

He looked back at his younger self. 

“But you're also going to have moments you wouldn't trade for anything.” 

 Albert said nothing. 

“And one day you're going to look back at this room and realise you had absolutely no idea what was coming.” 

There was a flash of light. Then he was gone. Albert stood in the doorway. The room was empty. The radio crackled. 

"Going back to the corner where I first saw you 
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move"

No comments: